99 Things – #35 Ban Fall Weddings


First things first, yes this is a picture from my engagement. I thought it was fitting to add one of my own pictures on this subject because my fiancé was well aware of what she was signing up for by saying yes. The first topic I brought up when we started wedding planning was the date because I outlawed any fall wedding. She’s an Ohio State alum and we have season tickets. There was no way I would be missing a game for our own wedding. For her own sake she should avoid a fall wedding because I would not even pay attention to our wedding. Banning fall wedding was essential to our series 99 Things.

Every year couples get engaged and someone has the ridiculous idea of a fall wedding. Weddings are a ton of fun. Some of my favorite memories are attending the wedding of my friends but the fall weddings need to end. Saturday from September through November have one sole purpose, college football. Personally I do not care if my team has an off week. Plenty of excellent college football games will still be on television. I realize college football fandom may sound like a cult and this is because it is. College football has one of the shortest seasons in all of sports so missing even one week is painful for fans.

Take a trip back to November 2017 with me (Reminder, I am an Ohio State fan). My then girlfriend invites me to her mother’s wedding which falls on the Saturday after Thanksgiving. What game is scheduled for that weekend? THE™ Game. I respectfully declined my invitation to the wedding and chose to stay home with my father and watch John O’Korn lose to Ohio State. My girlfriend would break up with me in the following weeks likely because I missed her mom’s wedding. Anyone who prioritizes weddings over college football is no friend of mine. This is how I knew she was not the one for me. She did not love me the way I love college football.

This year I have to miss two Ohio State games due to family weddings. The first one occurs on the same day at Notre Dame at Ohio State. Yes, I am angry. Yes, unfortunately I am going. Yes, my fiancé gave me the option to skip the wedding but I am also not an idiot. I have already informed my fiancé I will be wearing my airpods throughout the evening to listen to the game. The second wedding is my own sister’s wedding. My own sister betrayed my family. Luckily the game is just Rutgers so by the time the ceremony begins the game will be out of reach for the Scarlet Knights. The game is at 3:30 and her wedding is at 4:00.

The epidemic of fall weddings is around us. Awareness is the biggest key to helping our fellow college football brothers and sisters. Spring weddings are beautiful. Summer weddings are elegant. Fall weddings are an atrocity. For those who feel my pain of fall weddings, we will survive and come out stronger. To quote Harvey Dent in Batman, “The night is darkest just before the dawn.” Do yourself a favor and request access to a television, bring a portable charger and get the venue’s wifi. Anything to have access to scores and highlights will be essential.

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